IV: Abschussen im Dunkeln

[Zach Kaiser]

"H-Huh? But I just said..." He trailed off as Usurii went into the kitchen, leaving him to scratch his head. But doesn't she not feel well? This was getting him really confused. I guess I'll just sit down.

And so he did, and waited patiently for Usurii to return and hoped he didn't hear a crash in the other room and would have to go running and find she'd dropped something because she tried to make tea while sick, but fortunately that didn't happen and Usurii returned with their cups of tea.

Isac sipped the tea lightly. He liked tea well enough, but mostly he seemed to prefer just water. Which he guessed made sense.

"So...umm...if it's not that you haven't taken any pills for awhile, what's making you sick?" Not that there necessarily had to be a specific reason, but with the population as spread out as it was in the City of Shadows communicable disease wasn't terribly common.

[Nayt]

"It's . . . it's complicated, but . . ." she trailed off.

Usurii was silent for a long time, content to just sip her tea and stew in her thoughts. Actually, the act of stewing wasn't so nice in the end, as she always concluded that she was going to have to talk with Isac eventually. She shifted in her seat uncomfortably. He tea didn't even taste right.

"Well, um, you know how . . ." she cleared her throat. There was no politically correct way to put it. "You know how we've been, um, active recently?"

And she hoped to all holy darkness that Isac understood what she was talking about; she already felt awkward enough without having to explain the birds and the bees to her boyfriend.

[Zach Kaiser]

"Active?" Isac was a bit puzzled by this, trying to figure out what it had to do with Usurii being sick. He stared down at his lap for several moments before going, "Oh!" There was only one thing that made sense, after all.

"So all the running around we've been doing wore you out, and you got sick?"

...Given Isac's behavior it was likely she wouldn't likely have to explain anything to him, but she was going to have to be a bit more blunt to get him on the right subject to begin with, it seemed.

[Nayt]

"Ugghh," Usurii groaned as she palmed her forehead.

So she was going to have to explain it to him, then. Or, at the very least, be a lot more blunt about it. Usurii briefly wanted to scream.

"Sex, Isac," she replied as if she were addressing a mentally handicapped manchild, "We've had sex a few times."

Addressing him that way may have been a little rude, but she wasn't feeling too good at all, and when Usurii wasn't feeling too good, she could get awfully cranky. When she was cranky, she wasn't the most patient person in the world. This, at the very least, was something Isac was probably accustomed to.

[Zach Kaiser]

"Ohhh...sorry," he replied, chuckling bashfully. He probably should have realized that, he supposed. But, well, they were kind of active in a more mundane way, so maybe it was fair, but Usurii always got a little cranky when she wasn't feeling well. It didn't really bother him.

In any case, being on the subject of that, he realized that sex had something to do with why she was sick. If it was exhaustion from too much sex she probably wouldn't have yelled at him because he'd have been close, and besides he didn't think they were having sex quite that much.

I wonder if we had the house to ourselves if we could have sex until we were completely exhausted? Wait, focus, sickness. So if sex had to do with her getting sick, then...

He suddenly looked at Usurii wide-eyed. "You mean...I gave you something I had and forgot about because of the amnesia! Oh god! I'm so sorry, I didn't think...well I mean of course I couldn't--wait, didn't the doctor give me a full checkup at some point? Shouldn't that have come up? Did he miss something?"

Needless to say, Isac was really confused again.

[Nayt]

"Wh-- what?! No!" Usurii exclaimed quickly, only to stammer a second later, "I-- a-- at least, uh, I-- I don't think so! I'm pretty sure you didn't have anything!"

If he did, she'd have never slept with him. Being an Ersatzshad was hard enough without having to mix human diseases into the matter.

Oh God, this was going worse than she thought it would. She should've never even brought it up. She could've just gone to their Master and had this whole matter taken care of and there'd be no concerns from that point on. No need for awkward discussions or anything like that-- but . . . no! That was horrible! Especially since this could have meant so much! It went against everything she ever said about herself, everything she ever believed about Ersatzshad! To her knowledge, she was the first of her kind to ever have this predicament.

"I-- okay, Isac, this is going to sound really crazy, because I know that it contradicts essentially everything I've told you about this, but . . ." she trailed off, took in a deep breath, shut her eyes, and stammered out, "I seriously think I'm pregnant."

[Zach Kaiser]

Isac breathed an audible sigh of relief when Usurii denied his suspicion. Amnesia or no, he didn't think he'd have been able to forgive himself if he'd infected Usurii with something like that. Though he couldn't actually remember anything specifically that it was possible to, and for once he took his ignorance as a good sign.

After Usurii spoke, Isac went over what she said again. He ran it through his head several times; just this once, he absolutely needed to make sure he wasn't mistaking anything or missing something or otherwise getting the wrong idea somehow. When after a thorough examining he decided that he wasn't only then did he react.

He wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

[Nayt]

Usurii was surprised when Isac threw his arms around her, but not unpleasantly so. She ultimately did the same, though--wrapped her arms around him and carefully buried her head into his chest. It was instilled in her to be careful, actually. She'd accidentally horn-stabbed people for hugging her before; it wasn't pretty. Isac had to be treated for stab wounds once for that, too. But that was neither here nor there.

"I'm scared, Isac," she whispered into his chest.

That was the first thought that crossed her mind when she began to suspect it earlier. She was showing all the signs of human "morning sickness," and with Ersatzshad isolated from humans, there were few diseases that actually ran rampant through their society. Aside from malnourishment, they didn't get sick for too many reasons. Waking up sick with no apparent reason available was a worrisome thing. Vomiting until she was only dry heaving was worrisome. Connecting the dots was utterly terrifying.

"I-- I mean-- i-- it shouldn't even be possible!" Usurii exclaimed, "W-- we're-- we can't even have children . . ."

[Zach Kaiser]

As Usurii leaned into him, Isac began to stroke her hair lightly, being careful to avoid her horns and risk stabbing himself on her again. He...wasn't really sure what to think about all this. After all, he was used to Usurii guiding him; when even she didn't know what to do...

No, he told himself he needed be there for her, and that meant being strong in situations like these. Even if he wasn't any more sure what to do than she was.

Needless to say, the reality of the situation hadn't truly sunk in yet.

"It'll be okay, don't worry. Let's..." He swallowed hard; he'd never thought he'd suggest this himself. "Let's go see the doctor. We should make sure, and maybe he tell us what's going on."

Perhaps due to the amnesia, Isac did not have the same feelings of loyalty that Usurii and others seemed to; he couldn't quite bring himself to think of him as his master, and generally avoided contact with him if he could help, letting her deal with him instead. But he was a doctor all the same, and he couldn't think of anyone else who could help them figure this out.

[Nayt]

"N-- no!" she shook her head quickly.

Usurii pulled away from Isac slightly, though not so much that she was out of his arms entirely. She put only a half foot of space between their bodies, letting her look into his eyes.

"I-- I don't want anyone else knowing about this! N-- not Master, not any of his associates . . ." she tensed up, "I-- I don't want to be the only one of us that can . . ."

She imagined a number of horrible things that could come from it. After all, it was an established belief that women Ersatzshad were sterile. They simply could not make a child, not with a human and not with another Ersatzshad. They'd tried before (though, it wasn't Usurii herself that tried). All attempts ended in failure. So, then, what would happen if Usurii were the only Ersatzshad woman that could have children? For her Master's associates, she would become an experiment. They would want to know what made her different from others. For other Ersatzshad, she would become a commodity. These were both worst case scenarios that scared her more than the idea of pregnancy itself. The reality of that, actually, hadn't set in for her yet, either . . .

[Zach Kaiser]

"O-Oh." That was a little surprising; Usurii usually seemed to have complete trust in the Master. It was actually a little relieving that she didn't want to go see him, though.

Unfortunately, that didn't leave much in the way of options as far as he could tell. "Well, if you don't want anyone down here to know, that just leaves the human world, but doctors there won't be much help, will they?" Of course, that was presupposing she'd be willing to go to a human doctor to begin with, which was doubtful.

[Nayt]

"I . . . I have no idea what to do," Usurii admitted.

Which was extremely hard for her to do, especially to Isac. She usually had to be a leader for him, specifically because he had a hard time remembering things. She had to know what to do and what not to do at all times. If neither of them had a clue, then they might as well be taking shots in the dark.

"Honestly, I . . ." she looked up into his eyes.

She didn't even have ideas. Earlier, when Mimi and Isac were gone, she rummaged through all the symptoms in her head. She used all her experience as a nurse to try diagnosing something else, yet this was all she could conclude. Usurii still didn't know if she wanted this to be true or not. All she knew was that she, in fact, knew nothing at all, and was absolutely terrified.

"I-- I need to be tested," she took in a deep breath and closed her eyes, "I think . . . I think a human doctor could do that. A-- a small town human doctor, that is. Anyone else would just . . ."

. . . cut me into a thousand pieces to understand what I am.

[Zach Kaiser]

Would just what? Well, it didn't really matter. If Usurii didn't want to see a city doctor, then they'd just have to find a country one! Though, did he know any country doctors? He couldn't recall having visited one with Usurii, which left...

"I'm not about to turn a kid away-"

"-ou alright? What hap-"

"-not your-"

"If you don't speak, how can-"

"-your parents?"

"-that you can even lift it is-"

"...I may know a place," Isac said quietly, not realizing he'd been staring into space catatonically for a little bit.

[Nayt]

Usurii opened her eyes when Isac spoke. At first, she was just confused. Then she was concerned. She . . . she drew the connection quickly enough. Not the exact idea, but the implication. She recognized that look. That blank expression. It was an expression of vague recollection.

That was set on the back burner in the name of self preservation, though. Usurii wasn't in the right mindset to approach that issue right now.

"Who?" she asked.

If it was really recollection like she guessed, then there was a fair chance it was someone Isac knew before he forgot most of his life. If it wasn't, and it was just people he'd met before-- well, actually, it was a risk either way. Someone he couldn't recall versus someone he barely knew . . .

[Zach Kaiser]

Isac's brow furrowed. He tried to concentrate, to remember more, but all he had were flashes--voices, images, disconnected and vague, and the more he chased them and tried to come up with something concrete the further they fled from his mind.

"...I can't remember," he said after a moment, sounding apologetic. "But I think I know where he is."

That was all that was clear. It was a very strange sensation; the names listed on maps were foreign to him, and yet he was certain that he could find the place again if he needed. "There's a forest, on the edge of a city...umm...I don't remember it's name, but I know where it is. The doctor is there."