And the World Shall Forget You

[Zach Kaiser]

The silence seemed to drag on for an eternity, and every moment he was afraid Etsu would hit him, or storm out and do something stupid like try to walk back home in the dead of the cold night half dressed.

"I promise, I'm telling the truth," he said solemnly. "I...I know I'm not a perfect person, Etsu. I'd be lying if I said I never hurt a girl's feelings before." His recent encounter with Maya had certainly proved that.

"But...to forget something that important...it's just not something I could ever forget." And he didn't think he'd be forgetting that detail from now on, either. "I can understand if you're still mad at me, but...I really didn't know."

He could only hope Etsu would listen to him, and if not forgive him at least understand that his was a crime of ignorance, not malice.

[Nayt]

Further silence ensued. She had no words to describe her feelings right now. The hatred reduced from a slow simmer to nothing at all, leaving a horrible empty feeling in her heart. That was it. Emptiness. Everything was all dried up in her heart, but that didn't stop her tear ducts, all prompted by one simple realization:

I've made a horrible mistake.

"Th-- then I--" she took in a gasp between each word and hesitation.

And then, prompted by a pathetic whimper, Etsu cried in front of Eld for the second time since she'd shown her face in Hillcrest. It started off slow, with just a few tears streaming down her cheeks, but in time it would progress and worsen significantly.

"I said ar-rr those things and I--" she whimpered, "A-and I was so cruer-r--"

Her arms gave out. Etsu collapsed, face buried in Eld's chest. This took most of the pressure off of her hips and put it onto his chest, possibly leaving him the opportunity to worm his arms out if he was willing to try. Etsu wouldn't notice, though. Suddenly all she knew was a horrible emptiness and guilt.

[Zach Kaiser]

Another long silence persisted, and it was only broken when Etsu finally down. He felt a splash of something cold and wet, and he realized that she was crying just before she collapsed on top of him.

"E-Etsu, hey..." He didn't know what to say. All this time he'd thought her dislike of him was due to her first impression, which wasn't a very good one to say the least. He'd never realized that all this time that she'd thought he'd forgotten a girl who was almost his fiancee.

Feeling the pressure on his arms lighten, he slipped them out from under her, and after a moment's hesitation gently wrapped them around her. "H-Hey, it's okay...you're not as cruel as you think. I mean, when you were nice, like today, I still had fun. Sometimes...I kinda had fun, even when you were mean. So...don't cry, okay?"

He didn't want Etsu thinking she was some horrible person--while it was true she'd been kind of mean to him, cruel was a bit of an exaggeration. He didn't feel horribly offended or anything. Despite all their arguing...he kind of liked her.

[Nayt]

"But I . . . but I hated you," Etsu whimpered. "Rear-rry hated you!"

All that ire was directed at Eld for so long, and all for a horrible misunderstanding. That's all this was. He never knew about the proposed arranged marriage . . .

No matter Eld's calmness and willingness to wrap his arms around her, comfort her and tell her it was okay, Etsu couldn't stop crying. It was alleviated a bit; she wasn't on the brink of sobbing anymore, but she was still shedding tears. Etsu was not a horrible person. She could be spiteful, yes. She could outright want to do physical damage to someone she disliked and believed had done her serious wrong. She could go so far as to hate that person with every fiber of her being. But there was always a reason. The person always deserved it. And when it turned out, like now, that the person really didn't deserve it-- that he was sincerely a good guy and didn't even deserve an aggressive jab on the shoulder, then she sincerely felt the guilt deserving of it.

Eld might not have thought she was horrible to him, but Etsu certainly did. She knew how horrible she'd been to him, and she deserved him hating her right back.

[Zach Kaiser]

Eld shook his head, though it would certainly go unnoticed in the dark. "But we had fun today, didn't we? And you've been helping me investigate the graveyard." He reached up and started stroking her hair, attempting to sooth her.

"So...maybe you wanted to hate me, because you thought I did something terrible, but...I don't think you actually hated me," he suggested. "I don't think you would be helping me, or could have had fun with me, if you really hated me."

[Nayt]

Yes, it was true. She had enjoyed her day with Eld today, but that was before he held her hands and she got to thinking about all those times when she was under the impression that their marriage was going to be arranged-- and then she thought about what Eld was doing the first night she got here, and the hate came right back out. Now that hate was gone. Permanently, more than likely.

She was almost coming down from this fit of hers. So many emotions flaring all at once . . . no wonder the girl was in the midst of a conniption fit.

"Sumimasen," she whispered at long last, "Sumimasen . . ."

It had taken Etsu a lot of willpower to come out and apologize at last, but she finally did it. She had to. She owed Eld that much. She owed this boy, now. She owed him so much. What she owed him, only time would tell-- but if he ever needed anything from her, she'd take care of it. Guaranteed.

[Zach Kaiser]

"It's alright, it's alright." He didn't think he'd ever seen someone be so hard on themselves as Etsu was being. She was truly torn up at the thought that she'd simply felt animosity towards him, even though she really hadn't done too much other than argue with him a lot. He wondered just what she thought of him, then. What had she been hoping for when she first arrived? That maybe, even though the arranged marriage had fallen through, they'd...?

He wasn't sure that was a question he was ready to contemplate just yet.

Seeing as she was finally starting to calm down, he decided it was time to speak up. Not that he minded give her a shoulder to cry on or anything, but there was one thing he'd prefer to rectify before she moved the wrong way.

"Ummm...s-sorry to bring this up, but...I should probably put some pants on," he said meekly. While he'd momentarily forgot about his state of dress, now he was getting a bit embarrassed, especially as with Etsu on top of him the blankets had kind of slipped off.

He really, really hoped she didn't turn around to check.

[Nayt]

That . . . was an astoundingly strange thing to say. What the heck was he even talking about. Etsu sat up, sniffled once, and wiped the last of her tears from her eyes.

"Nani desu ka?" she said with the utmost confusion.

And before she could even think that it was a horrible idea, she reached her hand back and touched him on the hip, only to realize that he wasn't even wearing underwear-- and that it was the whole issue that prompted this whole mess. She'd completely forgotten about it. Etsu froze up when she felt his bare skin, and had a decidedly different reaction from the last time she had a hand anywhere near a place on Eld that was usually covered up by pants. She shivered and froze entirely, and if Eld had simply pushed her, she'd have fallen in the opposite direction and just pretended to be dead for awhile.

Instead of that, Etsu withdrew her hand from his hip quickly and rolled off of him-- only to roll as far away as she possibly could, grasp the covers, pull them over her head, and practically hide away from Eld and his nudity as far on the other side of the tent as she could possibly hide.

"G--- g-gomenasai," she whispered meekly.

[Zach Kaiser]

"Y-You don't have to apologize." That was at least kinda his fault. He should have just slept in his clothes; it would have been simpler. He quickly fumbled around for his sweatpants and pulled them on, rendering him decent once again.

"Alright, I'm dressed. Sorry," he added, feeling like he should apologize for that at least. It didn't occur to him it was kind of her fault for pretending to be asleep.

Trying to get over his embarrassment, he decided that it would be kind of awkward to just go to bed after that. "H-How are you feeling?" he asked instead, wondering if there was anything more he could do for her.

[Nayt]

Etsu was not laying here next to this boy. Who was naked. She was not doing that at all. She had not pinned him down when he was naked, either. No. That did not happen. This was a factor in this situation that Etsu Kotaino was going to repress by morning and never speak (or even think) of again.

Though honestly, Eld should've been slapped for getting naked with her still inside of the tent, regardless of if he thought she was asleep or not. But it just so happened that hitting him again would topple over this tower of guilt that she'd built for herself.

"I-- I am . . ." Etsu stuttered.

She didn't often find herself stuttering in anxiety, but tonight was a rare occurrence-- which is to say, something this emotionally trying had happened only twice in her life, and both times before tonight ended in far worse feelings than simple embarrassment. Part of her still expected some sort of fall.

". . . fine."

'Fine,' but also cold. It was only now that she was starting to realize that she was shivering, and probably had not brought enough blankets for herself and Eld. Or just herself. Boys had a habit of keeping warm a lot better than girls for some reason. This variable in the competition of sexes was totally and completely unfair, too.

[Zach Kaiser]

He wasn't sure that she was really fine, but there was limit to how much she could deal with at once. Eld had little doubt she'd need a bit of time to think before she truly could feel better.

What he couldn't help but notice, though, was that she was shivering; even though he couldn't really see her that well, he could see the movement--and hear her shake. "It's colder tonight, huh?" he observed. "Maybe you should...uh...put on more clothes if you're cold." While he certainly felt cool, once he pulled the covers over him again he figured he'd warm up pretty quick.

[Nayt]

This was just . . . okay, so she was a little cold, but Etsu would do something about that eventually if it really started to get to her. That was not right now, though. Right now, she was feeling horrible every time she heard Eld's voice and had to acknowledge him next to her, because that always led to her thinking about all her experiences with him during her stay here in Hillcrest . . .

"Go to sr-reep," Etsu said, and if she didn't sound pleading enough, she continued to say: "Pr-rease . . ."

Warmth was not what she immediately needed right now. Right at this moment, Etsu needed to break away from Eld and be silent for awhile. She needed to force catharsis as quickly as possible, otherwise she had a feeling her heart would explode from the pressure.

She needed Eld to stop talking and go to sleep . . .

[Zach Kaiser]

Eld could understand why she might say that, but there was just one problem. "I won't sleep if I'm worried about you catching a cold. I can hear you shivering." Regardless of what moods she might be in now, things were only going to get worse if she got sick out here. They'd definitely have to cut the camping trip early, which would probably make her feel even more guilty.

Really, right now he was more worried about that than the investigation. Even if he'd cleared up a misunderstanding he still felt partially responsible for her emotional state right now.

"Or at least...come closer to my side of the tent. If we're near each other we'll share body heat." He'd keep his back to her if it helped her.

[Nayt]

"Sh-- share . . .?"

What if they'd actually been married? Would this be normal? Wouldn't she cuddle up to him every night, anyways? But-- no, they weren't married. That whole thing fell through. He never even knew about it. And it was too late for that to even hold any merit, anyways. Tonight was not a night when it should hold merit, either. Tonight was a night where Etsu should have been putting as much distance between she and Eld as possible.

He wasn't going to let that happen, though. Maybe he knew that she didn't have the heart to hit him, then. He was certainly taking advantage of this boon.

"A-ano . . . fine . . ." she whispered as she turned to him and scooted over.

He'd feel her up against him-- not throwing herself at him, but pressing up against him at least and sharing the same general space as he. She was laying on her side, facing Eld, and caught in an eternal debate about what next, and if she should even torture herself by doing this.

But she didn't act on any single conclusion she came to (which were actually entirely cyclic; she'd come to a conclusion-- something akin to no, I need to pretend this never happened, only to fall into an emotional trap and rethink this all over again). Instead she just laid there, chest up against his arm, forehead leaning on his shoulder, and hands just over his bicep. All she could do was hope that Eld would go to sleep eventually and that maybe she could try to sleep after. Hopefully come morning this'd all just be some horrible nightmare . . .

[Zach Kaiser]

That was...actually closer than he figured she'd get. But that was fine. He was slightly worried that she was just going to withdraw as soon as he was asleep, but there wasn't much that he could do about that. So he laid there determinedly still, as the last thing he wanted to do was sent Etsu into a rebound of being upset with him.

His mind was still reeling a bit from what happened, but with the extra warmth provided by her presence, he soon drifted off...